Feeling like a runner again

 Wow - the world turned insane since my last post. We’re 6 months into a pandemic. 6 months into not really going anywhere - working from home, no gyms, no going out, not much of anything. I spent the first two months dealing with some really tough situations and work, and adapting to this weird new life by drinking and eating too much, and going for really really long walks and doing yoga and thinking it was all going to get back to normal soon. Then I accepted that it wasn’t getting back to normal any time soon, so I stopped drinking too much, started tracking what I was eating and started doing a bit more strength training including a brief flirtation with a boot camp class in the park that wasn’t designed for 50 year olds and made me feel bad about myself. There was a brief period where OTF had outside classes when I could go, so I did that for a few weeks, then they changed their schedule and I had to re-cancel my membership. Work continued to be really hard and not what I wanted. I kept walking a ton - over 200 miles a month. Wore my shoes down to nothing. 

Lost 10lbs getting me to probably my lowest weight in 10 years. 

Then I decided to quit my job and restart my consulting business and it felt like a weight had lifted and all things were possible. Yeah, the pandemic is still raging. The country is a mess. The economy is a disaster and everything really is pretty terrible, but I feel more in control and hopeful. And I saw a post from a distant connection talking about how she was using the Nike Run Club guided runs and it caught me at just the right moment so I tried it. And its just what I needed. I’m about two weeks in, and I’m running every other day at least, and I’m varying my workouts, and it’s feeling good! I’m not pushing too hard. I’m  not doing too much. My foot feels ok. I’m slow - and I’m ok with that. I don’t have a goal other than getting outside and moving. And I’m ok with that too. I still do have my goal for the year which is to run an 8 minute mile (I did an 8:15 in January), so I’m working towards that. And still walking a ton. 

My last day in my 40s

Christmas run on the 606 - 50 degrees out!

Today was going to be a super-lazy, stay in pajamas kind of day - but then it hit 50 degrees and sunny, so I had to take advantage of it and get outside. M and I went to the 606 for a run. I did 3 miles without stopping, which is the most I’ve done at once in a long time. My workouts have been all OTF for 1.5 years, and I never get more than 2 miles in there. I’m feeling great that at age 49 and 364 days I can just knock out 3 miles at a decent pace (@10 minute miles). 

I’m not quite at my pre-surgery speed, but my strength and endurance is good. And I feel fully recovered and am so happy to not be dealing with cramps and mood swings and all that other crap. I wish I could’ve gotten this taken care of years ago. I also love that I don’t have to live in fear of menopause. I’ve had zero symptoms and my skin is better than every. 100% positive. 

I feel better than I did heading into my 30s. Not as good as 10 years ago. That was when I was in peak running shape, right before the injury. But considering that, I think I’m doing pretty well. I’ve found other ways to stay in shape and have been consistently active since then. 

Starting to catch up

So this morning I posted about today. And realized that I hadn’t posted in over a year. My last post was about discovering Orange Theory. That was just the beginning. I got totally hooked. And got in really good shape. I got stronger and faster and I love it. I was going 5x/week. Then I took 7 weeks off to recover from surgery and now (right this minute) I’m getting really sore from this morning. You do not use rowing muscles for anything in your regular life. And I rowed 3000m this morning, and did not take it easy despite my best intentions. I was between two young guys and my competitive side kicked in.

Changing gears... I’ve been thinking a lot about what to post, where to post and why this year. I gave up Facebook at the beginning of February. I only Instagram to look at Orange Theory benchmark results and piercing stuff (I got a little obsessed with piercings this year). I tweet, but mostly for work or work-adjacent stuff. Since I quit FB I’ve taken far fewer pictures, and really haven’t been journaling or writing in any way. I’m not giving myself any place for reflection. I’m not sharing much of what’s going on with me. I think I don’t care about the sharing, but need reflection. Trying to figure out what I want/need. And where to do that.

I begin again

Its been a year of a lot of change - too much for a quick before-work post - so today will be about today, and I'll catch up later.

Today was my first day back at the gym in 7 weeks. I had a laparoscopic bilateral salpingo-oophorectomy on October 1, because I was diagnosed with Lynch Syndrome a few months earlier, and since there are no reliable tests for ovarian and uterine cancers, which my genetics predispose me to, I got everything taken out. The whole process was much easier than expected, other than a few hours of discomfort in the recovery room, I felt surprisingly good. Uncharacteristically, I listened to my doctor and didn't go jumping back into my normal level of activity once I felt good. I waited the full, proscribed 6 weeks (and more since my dr. was on vacation week 6 and I couldn't get my all-clear appointment until yesterday) to start hard workouts and weight lifting. And since I don't belong to a regular gym anymore I was limited to running outside and minibands. Which I was not great about.

I learned or reconfirmed that I'm best when exercise is an appointment that I go somewhere to do. I do not push myself enough when I'm just running outside. I'm also really dependent on my usual level of exercise for weight control. I gained 6-8 pounds during recovery. I do not look or feel my best.

Mostly I felt disconnected from my physical self. I love what my body can do. I love being strong and pushing myself and I really missed that.

I'm running some, and think I've found a new 'thing'

Ever since my gym closed a few months ago, I've been kind of adrift and haven't gotten in a fitness groove. I got back into pilates, but the studio doesn't offer enough early morning classes, and I need cardio - so that's not a stand-alone solution. I tried ramping up my running, and that didn't end well. I joined a gym by my office and I hate it. It's the most poorly designed space ever, and it's dirty and there aren't rental lockers so I have to schlep stuff. I went to boxing sporadically. I like it when I drag myself there, but I don't like it enough to regularly drag myself there. Then M said "why don't we try OrangeTheory". I'm generally turned off by chains and things that appear culty. It's not close enough to my house to walk, or convenient for getting to work without hauling bags of stuff all over the city. So I wasn't that into checking it out even though I have a few friends who love it.

As I got more and more disgusted with myself, and wanted to find something to do with M, I decided to do it. I signed up for the free class last Saturday. I've been back three times since then.

It seriously lights up every circuit in my brain. My favorite workout has always been a mix of running intervals and weights. I like having something to measure against. And I like having someone else tell me what to do. I like having other people around me doing the same thing to measure myself against. This totally works for me. 

I can get up at 5:30 and make it to class at 6, then be home by a few minutes after 7 and get to work by 8:30 (with walking the dogs). And I can shower at home and not have to haul all my belongs around the city. 

I already feel like I'm improving. I've had to stop myself from going every day. I think this could work for a while. 

I am not running

The North Shore Half started about 40 minutes ago. I'm sitting on my couch.

About a week and a half ago my foot started hurting. It ached and I had the pinching up the side of my calf that happens when things are not good. I've been taking it easy since then. The pinching is gone. The ache is still there. Both around the surgery and around the spot where my foot got smashed shortly after surgery 2. It doesn't hurt much, but it doesn't feel right. I think things are just irritated and it'll get better with rest, ice and anti inflammatories, so I'm babying it.

And I'm done with long runs. I apparently just can't handle much milage at all. I didn't get much above 15 a week, but that seems to have pushed me over the edge.

I'm very sad. I'm mourning. I really love the whole process of training. I love the time to myself being outside doing something tangible. I love the simplicity and measurability of it. I love how it helped me redefine myself. I love how running showed me different views of so many places I've been.

Of course it's absolutely gorgeous out. 60s, low humidity, light breeze. Perfect morning for a race. Wish I was out there.

Running down memory lane

I had to be in London this week for work and decided to stay for the weekend. Which meant that I had to do my long run here. What a hardship! It was in the low 60s and cloudless Saturday morning. I ran from my AirBnb to Hyde Park, then just zig zagged around the park until my app told me I'd run 10 miles. I took it easy and took pictures along the way and took the tube back. 

I spent 6 months living a few blocks from the park when I was 20. I wasn't a runner then, but I spent a lot of time walking and lounging in the park. And my favorite spot was near the Henry Moore sculpture in the photo above. The last time I went looking for it I couldn't find it, some research told me that it was taken down for many many years, and only re-installed in the last few years. So I wasn't losing my mind! It was nice to see it again. 

I ended up walking another 7 miles after my run yesterday and 7 more today. My legs and foot/ankle actually feel pretty good. I'm going to try to get a short run in tomorrow before getting on a plane for the day.